Chuck Your Phone

Backroad Ramblings

Can you hear me? Can you hear me now? What? You’re cutting out. Pull over! Don’t move your head! Can you hear me now?

Everybody’s had conversations like this before, especially if you live out in the boonies. It’s just one of the prices we pay for not living in a big city. 

But if you’ve had it with trying to have a conversation and you’re sick of that stupid phone and you want nothing more than to chuck it as far as you can, you’re in luck. There’s a place you can go and throw that thing as far as you can and maybe even win a world championship.

The World Mobile Phone Throwing Championships is held in Finland every year, with people from all over the world competing. Apparently, there are places in the world that has cell service just as bad as ours. Finally, one day somebody realized they could make money from all these angry people throwing their phones and arranged a competition.

It started in 2000, when the men’s winner chucked his phone 48 feet. But either people got angrier or they got better at throwing phones, because last year’s World Champion, a guy from Austria, threw it 92 feet, and that was short compared to the guy from Belgium who tossed his phone 110 feet in 2014. The phone service in Belgium must be really, really bad.

 If you want to get fancy, you can also enter the Freestyle Mobile Phone Throwing, where you add creative choreography. This is for when you’re so mad you dance around for a while before giving it a fling. It is also for the indecisive person, who is furious with the phone, but holds on for a while before throwing it because he knows he’ll just have to go to town and get a new one. 

At any rate, it might be fun to go see the Phone Chucking Contest. It might even be fun to throw your phone as far as you can. But when you’re over being mad, phones are a pretty handy thing to have around. I sometimes wonder how all those pioneers came across the Wild West without them. 

Even if we have to stop in the middle of the road to talk, or stand still without moving our heads, or call each other five times to finish a conversation, it’s still a pretty small price to pay for not living in the big city.

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